Nice Article ( taken from Young Blood, Inquirer) You MUST READ the hereinbelow article.
Title: A GRADUATION GIFT
First posted 11:52pm (Mla time) June 08, 2005
By Mabelle Biong DajaoInquirer News Service
Editor's Note: Published on Page A13 of the June 9, 2005 issue of the Philippine Daily Inquirer
DEAR Butoi,
I know you hate it when I call you that. Anyway, I'm writing because it's all I can do because I'm broke. Consider this as my graduation gift to you.
You are about to enter high school, the zone of identity crises and peer pressure, infatuation and first dates, hormones and zits. Be prepared, little brother. Be very prepared.
I am going to spill some secrets, mostly lessons that aren't taught in class. But do not let your learning stop here because even if you memorize all these, there are still more lessons that you'll learn on your own. The hardest lesson I've learned is that friends are earned. They do not just present themselves to you as you wish. You have to find them. But you have to be a friend first before you can find one. They are living testimonies of your worth as a person, so choose your friends wisely.
Choose but do not discriminate. Do not judge people according to the capacity of their brains or the thickness of their wallets or the extent of their popularity. Big brains don't necessarily go with big hearts. People with fat wallets usually have fat egos. Popularity doesn't guarantee a good character. Look into their hearts and the way they live their lives and how they accept you for being you.
Do not impose yourself on people who clearly don't want to be with you. Some people will hate you no matter how good you are to them. Steer clear of these monsters; they'll feed on your self-esteem. You are under no obligation to prolong the existence of such hideous creatures.
People hate and love you for no apparent reason. But try to be lovable anyway. You have nothing to lose in being good.
Talk to Papa and Mama regularly. Tell them everything that's troubling you with all honesty. Don't hold back. If you encounter serious problems, ask for their advice. They love it when you do that.
Life in high school is tough. Growing up is tough. But hold on to your principles. You need to keep a good grip on them especially when the emotional roller coaster starts. Amid confusion, don't lose sight of your goals and of what you want to be when you grow up. It is important to dream, but be realistic. Let Papa and Mama be your connection with reality.
Don't allow your world to be governed by just one person. Expand your horizon. Do not be too dependent on someone. Depend on yourself, but do not be too self-absorbed as to think that you can exist alone, without human company. It is not only weird; it is unhealthy.
Take it from me. One weirdo in the family is enough. Everybody is interconnected, so everybody is interdependent. Nourish your social life. Have lots of acquaintances. Be with different kinds of people.
Be different but not indifferent. Indifference spoils everything. It reduces something to nothing. It's the worst that can happen to an adolescent. An indifferent young person grows old before his time.
Cultivate your enthusiasm. Develop your personality. You have so much potential. Laugh with a lot of people but reserve your tears for those who truly care.
Just because you are different from the rest doesn't mean you're a freak. Sure you're small; it's in your genes -- our genes. Take comfort in the fact that soon you will outgrow me by several inches. I am sure of that. Kill me if it doesn't happen.
But really, there's nothing wrong with being short or having frizzy hair or crooked teeth. These are just appearances, although high school students make a big deal of these things. Don't let insecurity erode your self-confidence. Physical appearance plays a role in first impressions but that's about it. What really matters is your personality and outlook in life.
You're lucky you need not wear braces. You may have to wear teeth braces, but not the Milwaukee. Not the kind that makes you look like a rejected robot. Not the kind that makes you want to put paper bag over your head. Not the kind I had.
You're lucky, but don't push your luck too hard. Be conscious of your posture. Straighten your back. I don't want you to be like me.
Do not be intimidated by smart people -- the ones that are smarter than you. Bear in mind that being smart is not the only prerequisite to success. It may appear as though smart people have an edge in life, in choosing their career paths, in getting admission to prestigious colleges, in acquiring scholarships. They have clear plans about their future.
But smart kids usually have their weaknesses embedded in their chests. Most of them lose their sense of equilibrium once their hearts come under attack. No one can love wisely. No one, and especially not the smart ones.
What appears like love is often just infatuation. It is not just sparks and butterflies and spontaneous combustion though it may start with that (and in my book it has to start with that). These things are common in young adults. I had plenty when I was your age. Love is beyond all that. It is beyond all reason.
But I am in no position to discuss it thoroughly. Heck, I'm still waiting for it to happen. There have been many false alarms and fair warnings. I do not know much about love and loving. In the vast ocean of love, I only have a thimble of understanding.
But this is what I have come to understand: to love is to accept the verdict of reality without bitterness, without regret, without a smidgen of a doubt. When you love, you will get hurt. Accept it as a fact. It's part of the pain-pleasure phenomenon. You cannot love wisely because loving doesn't involve thinking. Thinking results in a conscious choice. But you cannot choose whom to fall in love with. The trick is to wait for the right time.
It is not advisable to fall in love while you still have your studies to attend to. Stay away from it, if possible. You cannot avoid it, but you can at least throw some barriers in its path. Be cautious of that feeling and don't let it take root. Not yet. Love is a totally new experience hat can turn you into a totally new person. Pray that you will not fall prey to love's fatal embrace -- not yet, anyway.
I'm done lecturing you. Be good.
Mabelle Biong Dajao, 20, is a Medical Technology student at Velez College in Cebu City.
First posted 11:52pm (Mla time) June 08, 2005
By Mabelle Biong DajaoInquirer News Service
Editor's Note: Published on Page A13 of the June 9, 2005 issue of the Philippine Daily Inquirer
DEAR Butoi,
I know you hate it when I call you that. Anyway, I'm writing because it's all I can do because I'm broke. Consider this as my graduation gift to you.
You are about to enter high school, the zone of identity crises and peer pressure, infatuation and first dates, hormones and zits. Be prepared, little brother. Be very prepared.
I am going to spill some secrets, mostly lessons that aren't taught in class. But do not let your learning stop here because even if you memorize all these, there are still more lessons that you'll learn on your own. The hardest lesson I've learned is that friends are earned. They do not just present themselves to you as you wish. You have to find them. But you have to be a friend first before you can find one. They are living testimonies of your worth as a person, so choose your friends wisely.
Choose but do not discriminate. Do not judge people according to the capacity of their brains or the thickness of their wallets or the extent of their popularity. Big brains don't necessarily go with big hearts. People with fat wallets usually have fat egos. Popularity doesn't guarantee a good character. Look into their hearts and the way they live their lives and how they accept you for being you.
Do not impose yourself on people who clearly don't want to be with you. Some people will hate you no matter how good you are to them. Steer clear of these monsters; they'll feed on your self-esteem. You are under no obligation to prolong the existence of such hideous creatures.
People hate and love you for no apparent reason. But try to be lovable anyway. You have nothing to lose in being good.
Talk to Papa and Mama regularly. Tell them everything that's troubling you with all honesty. Don't hold back. If you encounter serious problems, ask for their advice. They love it when you do that.
Life in high school is tough. Growing up is tough. But hold on to your principles. You need to keep a good grip on them especially when the emotional roller coaster starts. Amid confusion, don't lose sight of your goals and of what you want to be when you grow up. It is important to dream, but be realistic. Let Papa and Mama be your connection with reality.
Don't allow your world to be governed by just one person. Expand your horizon. Do not be too dependent on someone. Depend on yourself, but do not be too self-absorbed as to think that you can exist alone, without human company. It is not only weird; it is unhealthy.
Take it from me. One weirdo in the family is enough. Everybody is interconnected, so everybody is interdependent. Nourish your social life. Have lots of acquaintances. Be with different kinds of people.
Be different but not indifferent. Indifference spoils everything. It reduces something to nothing. It's the worst that can happen to an adolescent. An indifferent young person grows old before his time.
Cultivate your enthusiasm. Develop your personality. You have so much potential. Laugh with a lot of people but reserve your tears for those who truly care.
Just because you are different from the rest doesn't mean you're a freak. Sure you're small; it's in your genes -- our genes. Take comfort in the fact that soon you will outgrow me by several inches. I am sure of that. Kill me if it doesn't happen.
But really, there's nothing wrong with being short or having frizzy hair or crooked teeth. These are just appearances, although high school students make a big deal of these things. Don't let insecurity erode your self-confidence. Physical appearance plays a role in first impressions but that's about it. What really matters is your personality and outlook in life.
You're lucky you need not wear braces. You may have to wear teeth braces, but not the Milwaukee. Not the kind that makes you look like a rejected robot. Not the kind that makes you want to put paper bag over your head. Not the kind I had.
You're lucky, but don't push your luck too hard. Be conscious of your posture. Straighten your back. I don't want you to be like me.
Do not be intimidated by smart people -- the ones that are smarter than you. Bear in mind that being smart is not the only prerequisite to success. It may appear as though smart people have an edge in life, in choosing their career paths, in getting admission to prestigious colleges, in acquiring scholarships. They have clear plans about their future.
But smart kids usually have their weaknesses embedded in their chests. Most of them lose their sense of equilibrium once their hearts come under attack. No one can love wisely. No one, and especially not the smart ones.
What appears like love is often just infatuation. It is not just sparks and butterflies and spontaneous combustion though it may start with that (and in my book it has to start with that). These things are common in young adults. I had plenty when I was your age. Love is beyond all that. It is beyond all reason.
But I am in no position to discuss it thoroughly. Heck, I'm still waiting for it to happen. There have been many false alarms and fair warnings. I do not know much about love and loving. In the vast ocean of love, I only have a thimble of understanding.
But this is what I have come to understand: to love is to accept the verdict of reality without bitterness, without regret, without a smidgen of a doubt. When you love, you will get hurt. Accept it as a fact. It's part of the pain-pleasure phenomenon. You cannot love wisely because loving doesn't involve thinking. Thinking results in a conscious choice. But you cannot choose whom to fall in love with. The trick is to wait for the right time.
It is not advisable to fall in love while you still have your studies to attend to. Stay away from it, if possible. You cannot avoid it, but you can at least throw some barriers in its path. Be cautious of that feeling and don't let it take root. Not yet. Love is a totally new experience hat can turn you into a totally new person. Pray that you will not fall prey to love's fatal embrace -- not yet, anyway.
I'm done lecturing you. Be good.
Mabelle Biong Dajao, 20, is a Medical Technology student at Velez College in Cebu City.
posted by CHICAY at 11:49 AM
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